Procrastination

I have found that I am an excellent procrastinator. I am not proud of it. I can't think of a single thing that is better if put off for a long time... except... perhaps I can safely procrastinate "finding a husband," even though I'm not looking for one. But really, procrastination may be my biggest weakness. It is a huge problem, and I want to fix it. I must figure out why I procrastinate, to be able to come up with a long-term solution for the problem. I think it all comes down to "what I wanna do," or "what I would rather do." I would rather play Upwords with my family than write my humanities outline that has been hanging over me all weekend like a vulture over a gazelle carcass. I would rather go to bed early than write my humanities outline. I would rather plan a surprise for my sister's birthday than write my humanities outline. I would rather clean the kitchen than write my humanities outline. I would rather go running with Murphy (cousin's dog) than write my humanities outline. I just don't wanna do it! The longer I say "I don't wanna," the easier it is for me to put it off. I tell myself that I will feel much more motivated if I do something pleasurable before starting working on the outline. But once I do something fun and start on the outline, then I just want to keep having fun. I really just need to change my attitude about the procrastinated task before it eats me alive. I could get so much done if I convinced myself that I was interested in the subject material. I really do enjoy the history of art, literature, and music, and I find it very interesting how they all relate to each other in the grand scheme of things. I really am interested in it. Now I merely have to come up with motivators. If I write a really good outline, it will make the paper really easy for me to write later this week, and I can turn it in early and get extra credit! Now THAT'S a motivator. Whenever I feel like saying, "I don't wanna!" I should tell myself "I really want to do this; the sooner, the better!" It's all an attitude adjustment. I'm not lying to myself; I'm simply kicking the virus out of my system and letting myself be run by the ultimate operating system. This operating system is full of purpose! Procrastination keeps me from living a purposeful life. I need to surrender my procrastination to the Lord, and ask Him to keep my attitude in check and give me joy in accomplishing the necessary tasks in life. Is it really that simple?

I did actually have a good day at Old Navy today. I don't know if I just got lucky to not run into grumpy customers, or maybe God sent me a bunch of "angels" in the form of pleasant shoppers. Or maybe God helped me to focus on the good things that happened throughout the day. It may have had something to do with me only working 5 hours today. Whatever it was, it was a good day, and I want to keep giving God control of my attitude.

I thought this quote by Charles Swindol adequately summed up everything I have reflected on today:

The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude to me is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than success, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, gift, or skill. It will make or break a company...a church...a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past...we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10 percent what happens to me and 90 percent how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes.

So I will wake up tomorrow morning and choose the attitude that I want to have -- one that is full of purpose.